Guest post by Lauren. Online dating edition. Quickmatch: who likes me? Choose between guy holding a chicken, and a bear. _________ Best OkCupid messages: "Your politics suck." "Wanna fuck me?"…
It took me three months to figure out there's a LIGHT in the laundry room. ___________ God, that's embarrassing. Related: Haiku for Adulthood #80 and writing and stuff I’m fucking…
The food at El Farolito is awesome. The artwork...not so much. It reminded me of the backdrop to my seventh grade yearbook photoshoot. So, Jamie and I decided to pose.…
This orgy post just keeps on giving. Here's a snippet from an email I got from someone who read it, after he told me about his adopted Korean grandchildren: So,…
"Forgive me. I'm no poet." I forgive you your nothing but the leaning, the puffed up bend and snap of your glorious you. You ask if it is wrong -…
Look: See? Who needs stability or regular sex or a functioning liver when you have a fucking snail validating you on the internet? NOT ME. Related: Haiku for Adulthood #52-#56…
Last week, I wrote these limericks about being a frustrated bisexual, one of which included a story from my past where I behaved like a douche canoe. And I WAS…
I started a social media etiquette column for SF Weekly that launched Thursday. I still manage to come off as slutty, even though I'm writing about sexism on Digg. Go…