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While floating around ideas for the back cover of The Lesbian Sex Haiku Book (with Cats!), my editor challenged me to write a haiku description of the book. So obviously that’s what I’m doing instead of, like, trying to make money to survive. I can do that tomorrow. How often […]

Help me describe my haiku book in haiku?

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She was like the moon— I looked and looked but always she was part-hidden. ______ (Strictly speaking) I couldn’t know her well. And yet I did know her well. ______ I know the perfect arc of your spine the weapon of your mouth’s request. ______ I know the pools of […]

Haiku for (Long, Lost) Lovers

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A while back, I did a haiku series for The Toast called “If Lesbian Porn Were Accurate.” Such as: Naughty Lesbian Babysitter Has Surprise for Dad When He Returns Home She let the kids stay up until 11 watching Harry Potter. * Hot MILFs Engage in a Steamy Clam Photo […]

If Lesbian Porn Were Accurate

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Antonin Scalia “Naked impotence… pretentious liberty…ask the nearest hippie!”   Republican presidential candidates This isn’t over! I won’t stop until NOBODY has ANY rights.   Canadians Welcome, finally, to the 21st-century, America!   Those who compare everything to Hitler Lesbians are vegetarians. SO WAS HITLER. Coincidence?   Caterers across the […]

All reactions to the SCOTUS ruling on same-sex marriage in ...

Illustration: Kelsey Beyer
The latest installment of my and Kelsey’s lesbian sex haiku series on The Toast. This one = a summary of all lesbian movies ever made. And, and. I just turned in my manuscript for The Lesbian Sex Haiku Book (with Cats!). I don’t feel relieved at all! But January 2016. […]

Meet Gina Purrshon

These are some of the haiku I read at the Lit Crawl Muni Haiku Battle, which was super fun, even though (spoiler) I lost! You can read about it at Muni Diaries or watch a video recap below. Some of these won’t make much sense if you don’t live in […]

Haiku for Adulthood: Lit Crawl Muni Battle (Video)

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#279 Of course I read Cunt. Painting with my menstrual blood was transformative! _________ #280 Girl,  I would love to help you move that modular couch from IKEA. _________ #281 Cold? Here take my micro-fleece vest. I only wear it ironically. _________ #282 Have you reconciled your identity with race and class privilege? _________ #283 […]

Haiku for Adulthood: Lesbian Pick-up Lines