It was bound to happen. Someone on Etsy created a freakishly armed, giraffe-necked pillow, excuse me, manllow, in the form of Twilight’s Edward Cullen. Why was it bound to happen? Because you can’t spoon a poster, my friends. The artist does seem to have a sense of humor about her […]

Edward Cullen: Half man, half pillow

This is a hilariously horrifying video about masturbation. It also seems to imply that this kid is masturbating to his mother at the end. WTF. Just, wow.

creepy sex ed video from the 70s

The exercise-by-hand-job trend lives! This time the hilarity comes from Easy Curves, where a woman in a white lab coat tells us how “university research” has proven that you CAN get huge boobs if you’d only stroke this light saber for five minutes a day! The weirdest part of this […]

"Exercise" your way to bigger boobs

“Crazy Horse dreamed and went into the world where there is nothing but the spirits of all things. That is the real world that is behind this one, and everything we see here is something like a shadow from that one.” –Black Elk Vacations (even though I’ve technically been on […]

Sex Dreams: or I owe Steve Buscemi an apology

“Give the gift that Santa can’t give, a pap smear.” Fuck, I already mailed my Santa letter! I hope he’ll at least send the condoms that look like candy canes. Those should really be sold year round. There’s a Jewish one too. “Give the gift that will light up her […]

And here I thought CBS forgot about my vagina

this is what i get for swimming in lake michigan. time for me to clean my penis flippers. really, who thought this was a good idea? this looks like the mask jeff goldblum wore in The Fly.

your daily cup of what the f*ck